Tough times

My kids are a wreck. My oldest is really torn apart about this separation and the loss of her sense of family. She told me tonight she overheard her mom talking on the phone, saying she needed $250 just to keep the electricity on. Her car is going back to the bank, the rent is unpaid, the car insurance is unpaid and only God knows what else is next to come. It is bad. My daughter has really clung to anything she associates with me. She asked me in her sweet and innocent seven-year-old way if the night light I gave her will continue to light her room if the electricity goes off. She looks at that light as a tangible connection to me and a symbol of our relationship. What else will happen to her and our youngest? They are having to confront some very ugly realities that little kids should never have to know about. I worked round the clock for weeks on end to keep the bills payed and ensure their comfort. Now, that is all in jeopardy thanks to my wife's decision to cut the head off the golden goose. She doesn't have a full-time job. She barely has a part-time job. My kids are suffering from her inability to get and maintain a real job. She is an intelligent, articulate college-educated woman. I would have gladly lived under a bridge to support them had things ended honorably.

Because of the way my wife coldly manipulated the system to obtain 'justice' for herself, my kids are now wondering if their night light will work when the power is shut off. This is all so very sad and was unnecessary. Why would she do something like this without having some sort of solid plan? She had time to carefully consider her actions and she decided to execute her plan. She got the big 'bang' she was looking for in court and successfully obtained a restraining order against me. The judge granted me excellent visitation and effectively barred her from removing the kids from the area and/or denying me visitation pending the outcome of a divorce. Seems like she got everything she asked for but none of what she actually wanted. Why? Why would she do this? What purpose did it serve in the end? All my wife succeeded in doing was alienating her primary source of income and placing herself in severe financial jeopardy. I am beginning to feel sorry for her more than I am angry. She clearly didn't consider the outcome of her plan well enough.

I will always have a home for my kids where they can receive the love and support (and utilities) they need. They deserve consistency that has been denied. All to serve the ends of one person. We are all suffering so my wife can have her moment in the spotlight. She got it and now she is getting the bill for this betrayal. I haven't had to do a thing to bring about the consequences of her action. Life has a way of rewarding the deserving, I suppose. I wish her well in her new life and I honestly do pray she will find a way to pull herself together and provide for our daughters. I also pray she maintains her composure through all this adversity and learns some valuable lessons that she will carry with her the rest of her years. I don't mean that in any sort of nasty way. I do want her to have a good life but before she can do that I think she has to address the wreckage she created for our family.